Wherever you are on your journey in life, the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one with yourself. Self-love and self-acceptance is  often overlooked, and if you’re like me and come from a dysfunctional upbringing, can be tainted by other’s beliefs and actions which we adopt as our own, even if it’s not in support of our highest good. Regardless of where you come from, the good news is, actually, the BEST news is…we have the power to decide who we are and how we feel. Because when you peel all the fluff away, that’s all it is, a decision. Self-love and self-acceptance form the foundation for all other connections in our lives. By nurturing this relationship, you can enhance your emotional well-being and transform how you interact with others. Besides, when I started to practice loving myself intentionally every day, my world started to change, opportunities opened up and over time, I changed the trajectory of my life – and you can too.

The first step before all else is to become aware of how we speak to ourselves, our internal voice. I started talking to myself as if I was talking to my best friend, with more kindness and love. 

Here are five powerful strategies to cultivate a better relationship with yourself.

1. Practice Self-Compassion

Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend. This isn’t always easy at first, but with the practice of noticing the words and tone attached to them, and yes, your little voice has a tone when you’re speaking unkind to yourself, you have the power to change it. When you have a heightened awareness, you can stop and instead, see it for what it is, a pattern of behaviour, it’s not who you are and then cultivate compassion and understanding in that moment that everyone makes errors and that these do not define your worth. By using the ‘noticing’ tool and embracing self-compassion, you create a safe space for growth and healing.

“You are imperfect, you are wired for struggle, but you are also worthy of love and belonging.” – Brené Brown

2. Set Healthy Boundaries

Understanding your limits and setting boundaries is essential for maintaining a positive relationship with yourself. Learn to say no when needed and prioritize your own needs. Establishing boundaries not only protects your mental and emotional space but also teaches others how to treat you. If you can identify someone or something specific that you need to set a boundary with, start by practicing with a trusted friend, therapist or coach and get comfortable setting/saying it out loud. This helps you recall and feel confident when it’s time to use it.

3. Cultivate Mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness helps you stay present and build awareness of your thoughts and feelings. For many it can seem weird or scary sitting in silence and stillness, and trust me, that’s where the magic is so start small, 2 minutes, 5 minutes, maybe just count your breaths. Whether through meditation, journaling, or simply taking a few deep breaths throughout the day, mindfulness allows you to connect with your inner self. This connection fosters a deeper understanding of your desires and emotions, leading to greater self-acceptance. Practicing mindfulness allows you to enhance your ability to pause in the moment and listen to yourself to notice things, feelings and thoughts. 

“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.” – Steve Maraboli

4. Engage in Self-Care

Self-care is not just a trend; it’s a vital aspect of maintaining a healthy relationship with yourself. Whether it’s indulging in a hobby, taking a relaxing bath, or spending time in nature, prioritize activities that bring you joy and rejuvenation. I have recently found colouring, I loved it as a kid and now it’s become a way to unwind. By investing time in yourself, you reinforce the message that you are worthy of care and love.

5. Celebrate All the Things

Take the time to acknowledge and celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem. This practice reinforces a positive self-image and motivates you to pursue further goals. And some days those goals can be getting out of bed or drinking more water that day! Stop judging yourself so much, you are doing the best with what you know and now that your learning more, you can do even better! Create a habit of reflecting on your successes, and allow yourself to feel proud of your journey.

The Ripple Effect of Self-Love

Transforming your relationship with yourself not only enriches your own life but also has a profound impact on your relationships with others. When you practice self-love, you become more confident, resilient, and compassionate. This newfound strength enables you to engage with others in a healthier way, like a ripple effect, fostering deeper connections built on mutual respect and understanding.

As you embrace self-love, you begin to attract relationships that mirror the love and respect you have for yourself. The energy you emit influences those around you, and in turn, you create a positive environment that nurtures both personal growth and interpersonal connections.

In conclusion, building a better relationship with yourself is a powerful journey that leads to transformation in every aspect of your life. By practicing self-compassion, setting boundaries, cultivating mindfulness, engaging in self-care, and celebrating your achievements, you can pave the way for a more fulfilling life and enriching relationships with others. Remember, the love you give yourself sets the tone for the love you receive from the world.

“We don’t attract what we want, we attract who we are.” -Michael Beckwith

So, go on, give yourself the love you deserve!

Krista xo